99 problems... and a bitch is probably like erm.. 1%?

i'm not jay-z enough to have no problems of any girls at all. but seriously i think... jay-z has 99 problems... of course... a bitch isnt one of it. BUT, i think he has 100 problems... and that 1 problem... is a bitch. but technically she's not a bitch since he probably loves that overrated beyonce so much. hence... she's not the problem. so THAT's why its 99 problems....

right now... staying here in bintulu... im feeling empty. seriously. im okay during the day time since i keep myself occupied. but, when im not occupied... i start thinkin a lot. i honestly know... this Health Safety Environment thingy is bullshit to me. i mean... okay... i went to 2 trainings and 1 conference... im tellin you... i see ppl who are very excited and passionate and talking or giving formulas to memorize that regulations and all. you know what i think though? i think they're just a bunch of suckups, phonies, that i seriously need to smack them in their faces and tell them to get a fucking life. yes... that ran through my head. till now. however, i know i cant blame them... they love what they do. they have passion. regardless how the person is a silent type or what... if the person has passion in what their doing... they'll excel. seriously. they'll probably climb up to corporate ladder BS without any slips and fall.

as for me... i know ive been disliking what ive been doing since i started learning it. chemistry... really not my cup of tea. law and regulations... seriously... leave it to the dorks and nerds in the lawyer-ing world. as for me... please.. i need ppl's reaction, readings of interesting materials, figuring out what another person is thinking, figuring out the background of a company, to have the satisfaction and results of them putting their trust in me.

must i succumb to the mishaps of another and say 'dunia itu kejam' and basically wants everyone else who's having the same problem as he is to be miserable. i dont know if corporate malaysia is ready for the new vocalized generations of malaysia. a more positive, stronger group of individuals who will do something about something if they think something should be done. ignorance of us... MY generation... i would say... will prove detrimental to them. we just need guidance. to make them all... understand... who we are... what our thoughts are... and how we can improve in the malaysian way of thinking.

well... besides all that talk... lately i find myself listening to mellow songs because its really nice to listen to. mostly norah jones and joss stone. lately... i find myself... occupying my daytime... trying not to drown myself in the seas of emptiness and sadness, but once i get back... i find myself... contemplating all sorts of shit. being in such predicament really sucks big time. yes... i do think im stronger now. but... in this part of my life rite now... there's much more to worry about than just girls or getting A's for exam. i start worrying... about my life... my future. to succumb without any effort... would deem pointless and imprudent. wondering... most of the time... how did i tangle myself in such a web, and struggling more would just result in tiring myself... and just sucks the life more out of me. i really need to do something... something big. not just lying down in front of the tv thinking of the what if's.