Getting in a basket and carrying it yourself.....

My lovely wife apparently went through a whole lot of my writings (actually all of it i think!) and i was a bit shy of it, i dont know why. All i can remember during that time of my life was... i was a truly emo dude. like waaaaay emo. there was even one part of my life where i remember i was listening to aaaaall these rock emo songs, i mean, hey, they're really good songs, but i found that if i listen to it too long, it did kinda affect my personality in some way where i'm almost always utterly pissed off. But anyway, one thing my lovely wife commented on my writings was... 'Sayang, well, i know for a fact you really dont like your job... and the writings are very... expressive'. 

heheh. well for those who do follow my writings... they mightve noticed how my writings actually mellowed down so much after i graduated but may still be a bit depressing after i started working, although not as bad lah. 

Well, talking about jobs, one of the things i kinda derived is, that one's gotta love, be passionate of their job. but then again, the world's really big, and competitive... love it or not, eventually, there may be someone out there who's working hard, and not loving it. may be a whole LOT of them. but i've yet to meet someone who doesnt love their job, and be like on top management. it's someone's view who's honest and sincere and is willing to share how he got up there like it or not. 

Also, in regards to jobs, i was looking at my watch (well not literally lah), and its been more than 4 years of me working in various position albeit in the same company. and i guess it's high time i actually update my Resume or how most malaysians refer to it as CV. to be honest, i dont know what CV means to this point. i know i can google it up, but i guess i'll just be honest................... okay got it... CV stands for curriculum vitae. 

at times, i've been staring at my resume and decided to come up with two types of em actually. one is for creative side of which i know is more of my passion. like producing, writing, events stuff. The other one is more of a technical side of me, my engineering geeky side. well as much as i prefer the creative side, i wonder who would want to hire a guy who has no experience in producing, editing at his current age and where they can get so much fresher ideas from those newly grads. hence, i know ive got no choice but to have my technical resume updated to be used in the near future. it might be something i might not love, but maybe i dont love it because i'm in Bintulu, far away from great motivation like family and friends. plus, if i want something i know i'm passionate for but is at big odds, i should always have this technical thing with me. i have a wife to care for now, so i dont have much choice do it. 

nevertheless, it doenst hurt one to be honest about it and dream about it the best they can. 

One thing about writing resumes also, is that how it actually (and might actually NOT!) represent yourselves. heh. some people lie, some people just jack up the information from what they already input. but then again, i guess the best way is of course to put down everything about you there, coz you'll never know how they're drilling you down to the bones for information and details during the interview. 

Another thing about resumes (which also may be the cause of the previous paragraph) is jacking yourself up to make yourself standout from the others. most people find it difficult as i know a lot of humble people, but when it comes to the resume, its a dog eat dog world and hell, you need the job, you need the money and relieve your heavy responsibilities. well, you cant blame those people who wants to hire you too because they just want the best for their company and they definitely want to invest in someone who's worth investing it... so i guess its a fair world. The world is for people who work hard for it... but then again, u know not everyone works hard and yet get something beyond what they are worth. i'd guess you call that maybe 'luck'?? or politics? hehe. 

well, i guess, what i'm trying to say here is, no matter how much you wanna do what you love, finally it boils down to the people who are important to you the most, your family, your wife, your child, your gf. everything probably wont matter when you know you want the best for them. but, never stop dreaming of something you love, because you'll never know how things will finally turn over for your and it's your big break to that dream of yours, then the people you love can also feel and enjoy how you feel. 

oh well... for now, let's just keep it deep inside, dream about it, and not to forget, the most important thing... prayers to Him, and faith... a LOT of it..... Amin........